Monday, 8 October 2012

My computer committed fashion suicide


So my computer exploded. A KA--BOOM kind of explosion, with sparks and fire and smoke. This naturally led many neighbors to call the local police station to report suspicious behavior. I think some of the reports said we were making homemade bombs. Considering the ghetto suburb in which I inhabit. this was no surprise at all. 

I kid, I kid. My life isn't that interesting and my computer didn't explode on itself. It did however crash and die on me. I can’t load it up for more than thirty seconds before it crashes. I even got it to start on safe mode and then it crashed again! 

CRASHED ON SAFE MODE!
IT HAS THE WORD SAFE IN IT AND IT STILL CRASHES!!!
WHAT IS THIS?!

And it ain't even a blue screen of death. It’s this fuzzy plaid pattern in a rainbow of color.



How very fitting right? Even in its final days, my computer will stay true to its owner and reflect his overly flamboyant gayness.

So what to do now? The next course of action seems to get an Apple Macbook, which will complete my total hipster look and off course, provide me with a working computer. But they are so god damn expensive.
But the first thought to go through my head was “I rather spend this money on clothes”. I could get one of those cheaper MacBook Airs, but it isn't very hipster is it?

So really, lets see what $2,499 AUD would get you.

1) Alexander f*cking McQueen
to sit next to the Supre clothes in your wardrobe
Alexander McQueen Intarsia wool-blend dress $2,559
2) Liposuction on my chin
while the rest of my body remains fat
                                                            
Aesthetic Surgery Centre chin lipo $2,500
If I wanted to get my stomach it'll double in price :(

3) Rent a Friend for a week to make you look popular
but does not include sex

Rent a $50 p/h friend for a week 

The options are endless! But what I think I'm going to do is just cancel hiring Lola to be my friend for a week and use that money on a laptop.

Done.

12 comments:

  1. I need to feed my family!!!

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  2. For a second, I was holding my breath wondering what happened to your computer, but it crashed x_x How does a computer crash on safe mode? That's beyond me, maybe some anti-malware needs to be downloaded before restarting? :c Fuzzy rainbow belongs in a Radiohead music clip. Remember to sit in Starbucks with your Macbook, typing away with your chin held high. I've never actually stepped into Supre, does that boggle your mind? The music played in the stores actually give me a headache so I'd rather not risk it for cheap tacky tank tops. But ALEXANDER MCQUEEN *froths* Have you seen those Japanese rolly products that claim to have the same effect of liposuction? Rolling these prickly barrel things around the contours of your face doesn't sound promising, but lipo is scary :< Rent a friend? I'm intrigued, I'm suspicious, but I'm excited.

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  3. ha! that made me laugh! :)
    and that dress is beautiful *sigh* one day

    fashionistaface.blogspot.co.uk

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  4. Computers suck - I right my blog on a etch-a-sketch & use the photocopier at work to somehow get it onto the interwebs.

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  5. I've never seen a computer crashed this way, hahahhaha!
    Congratulations in advance for getting a new laptop anyway! (:

    xx
    http://jacque-g.blogspot.com

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  6. Buy a ginormous golden dildo.

    www.stylehuntingclub.com

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  7. not sure what computer you have but it looks like a graphic card/mboard issue.. at least its on trend..

    steph / absolutely-fuzzy.com

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  8. I think you're awesome! But I also feel like you misunderstand MacBooks. I assume that when you say 'Apple Macbook' you mean MacBook Pro, and when you said MacBook Air, you do in fact mean an Air. Why the Apple before the MacBook, dude?

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    Replies
    1. Ahahahahaha didn't even notice! My baddddd

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  9. Hahah hilarious post! Although McQueen does sound tempting.. get a MacBook. You'll never look back plus you can always salivate over McQueen images on style.com with your new swanky laptop!

    xx Sharday

    SHARDETTE BLOG

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